Sunday, May 31, 2009

Catching Up With Old Friends

Last night I went out with some friends from middle school. We met at a local bowling alley, so I assumed there would be some bowling. I was wrong. I have a short attention span, so I try to give myself an out by meeting people in places where there are some fun physical activities. Much to my disappointment, the Dance Dance Revolution arcade game was out of order as well. I was stuck sitting in the bar, being reminded that most people get married and have children and Party Girl is not an acceptable life path. The funny thing is that, although my peers have their serious lives to return to, they enjoy a good time and hearty laugh as much as I do. However, I'm greedy. I want it all the time. I don't want to live one single day without smiling and laughter. If I can throw an orgasm or two in there as well, even better.


I sometimes feel guilty about wanting nothing more than to feel alive and enjoy it. The world outside says that I should want something else. It says that I need more material possessions and more money. It says that I should be more beautiful, thinner, smarter. It says that I (and the thousands of people who are my neighbors, coworkers and friends) don't really exist. I am strangely comforted by this. I truly enjoy the anonymity that most people resent. I can seek carnal pleasures without fear of public humiliation. I can be a geek, dork, freak or weirdo. I'm free to pursue whatever desires I please...within reason of course.


Speaking of reason, I was struck by a moment of clarity last night. I decided not to drink the Long Island Iced Tea I ordered because I was already sobering up and I wanted to get out of that boring place. I hadn't gotten my weekly dance quota, so I was determined to go out and get it. The old classmates and I headed over to a jazz club, where one of the girls' husbands played with his Calypso band. We had a good half hour of dancing (maybe more since I have that annoying habit of losing track of time). I had a glass of rosé, and well, I didn't need it. The sobriety I was starting to feel disappeared and I found myself a couple of notches higher on the party scale than everyone else. Awkward!

Afterwards, I went to the waffle house with the last two people - both men as usual. One had flown in from Miami and was the reason why we all decided to get together, the other is local and has had a reputation of being a playboy since our early teens. When I looked at them as strangers, I couldn't envision them as friends. However, fate has a way of making unlikely matches.

Pull your damn pants up!

When is this fad going to end? I'm tired of looking at your underwear and watching you trip over yourself as you hold your pants up by the crotch. And what's with the belt? It's not holding anything up, so why bother wearing it? It's as pointless as a pair of lace gloves.

Guess what? The people who want to see your ass are other guys, not girls. Dumbass.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

and this is why I'm such a bitch

My ex’s mom passed away a few weeks ago, and I attended the funeral with a crowd of people bigger than the chapel could hold. I wasn’t that close to her, but he and I were once inseparable so I though t it at least appropriate if not necessary that I go and show some friendly support. This particular ex has been trying to get back into my pants forever, but we have a pretty comfortable rapport so I just let it slide off me most of the time. I mean, he’s a guy and guys can sometimes be dogs. I understand this. I accept this. He’s my ex, so I don’t give a shit what he does or who he chases – it’s not my problem.

He’s been pretty much calling me regularly since his mom passed and I’ve agreed to perhaps meet him for a drink or two one night whenever our schedules meet up or we don’t have other plans. I didn’t think much of it because I’m set in the way I think about him. It’s so very over. I always loved talking to him, but it’s more of a novelty now. I am not obligated to take his calls and I can feel free to excuse myself when I’m no longer entertained. I feel like I spent enough time listening to his BS when we were together to blow him off whenever I feel like it.

I had to hang up on him today. He crossed the line between just talking on the phone and asking questions that only a BF or lover has any business asking. Before realizing that it was time to hang up, I raised my voice and started arguing with him. Keep in mind that this is an office phone…why do exes want you to make such an ass of yourself?

I was trying to be nice to a MF, but I think we’re done here.

California: Gooey Liberal on the Outside, Hard Republican on the Inside

Today's hot topic is the California Supreme Court's decision to keep gay marriage illegal, upholding the majority vote on Prop 8. Their additional decision to consider those marriages valid for gay couples who took their vows while it was legal is what has created the real scandal. I mean, how can those be legal without legalizing gay marriage? Who thought this made sense and why does that person make so much more money than I do?

Religious advocates argue that we must protect the sanctity of marriage, something that I agree with in concept. I propose that we make divorce illegal as a solution to that problem. The liberals gasp and start creating their protest signs, but just hear me out for a sec. There would be some loopholes. For example, battered wives/husbands and those whose mates are compulsive, incurable adulterers would be absolved of their spousal responsibilities – as free as single people to find a new mate and remarry. The cheaters and oppressors they leave behind would be considered marital outcasts – still bound by law and financially responsible for their ex-partners. These people would not be allowed to remarry legally. “’Til death do us part” would take on the meaning that was initially intended by those words. Some of my friends think that domestic crime and suicide rates would skyrocket, but I believe that people would just consider what they’re getting into more carefully before taking the plunge.

Now we get down to the real reason why most people voted to pass Prop 8 - to prevent their kids from being taught about the homosexuality in school. Well folks, rumor is that "Gay Tolerance" is on the agenda for California's (and perhaps other states') curriculum. This madness about teaching homosexuality in schools was just a myth created by supporters of Prop 8 in the first place, but it appears that their plan backfired. All this media coverage has caused quite a stir. I agree that children should learn about sexuality from their parents first. Although it is extremely unfortunate that some kids are being taught that they are freaks and what they feel is wrong, but I do believe that parents really mean well (even when they teach us the backwards crap). Kids weren't learning to be gay from school in the first place, so it really doesn't make a f-ing difference anyway, but Mom and Dad should be the ones to open the door to that conversation.

Where is this all gong to lead? I'll tell you where. Gay marriage will eventually be legal (again). It will be at least mentioned in school curriculum. Mom and Dad will still tell their gay boys and girls that they are freaks, and nothing much will have changed except for the little slip of paper. Shame on us for fighting over this.